portada sexo por placer

Understanding sexual pleasure

thinking about the title of this post, in our head are raising an enormous quantity of questions” “But, shall we really talk about sex?” Is not something that “almost” all of us are doing? But, “Why do we need it?” Why, if we are having a break from it, we turn ourselves on, easier than when having it frequently? We even can have erotic dreams with our partner? Is sex the same even after having a baby?”

WhyWhy.. Why … Yes, all these questions and even more will be answered in this following lines. You might think,”Yes, sure, as if these might be the simplest questions one can answer! I have a life living with these doubts and still didn’t find an answer. Now, you’ll give me the answer.. Yes, sure… “. Be ready to be surprise… Yes, yes, yes… Be ready… This is #TheNowFamily :)

To follow the conversation we’ve started we:

Welcome you to the wonderful world of sex!

Zzzzzzzzzzzz … Hey! Knock Knock! Have you fallen asleep already?!

Jokes aside, we want to give you the best answers to so many questions and, as always, we do not have enough time. The first question coming to our mind is: what makes us desire to have sex, first of all? In 99.99% of the times we “make love ” is not precisely because we want to undermine the world of small people similar to us. No, we do not do it because we want to give birth to new generation of similar peeps like us, than why? ( At this point you might notice our love for why questions, aren’t you?).

Mmhhh, well, it is definitively for that one reason, that both of us know quite well… Hemm.. We want that pleasure that is so nice to feel.

And where does this pleasure comes from? Why (yes, another why…) we want it so much?

Well, here we are, trying to answer these whys. Even if the pleasure we feel is down there, (known as the genitals if we get technical and fine), it turns out that the brain is the responsible. It is our head, our brain that secretes a set of hormones suddenly during those seconds where nothing but “that” matters. And right after, it does not matter that much any more, it’s over … we usually feel like we are not interested any more, even our mood changes, especially in men. And you will say, “Hey! Wait, wait, this sounds to me, is it normal for my partner-husband-friend-boy to become less affectionate and a bit too much sleepy after the “you already know”? “Yes, my dear friend, and it’s not his fault (no, no is not his). It is all about their hormones.

The scientific explanation (which we will try to translate into a language to be understood by all of us human beings) is that when we get to that pleasure point (climax-ecstasy), the body gets its dose of hormones as if it were a drug (yes, you read well, a drug) and, for this reason, we arrive at a point when we want it again.

– Eeeeeeeh, but please stop, stop. Are you telling me that if I have enough of “love” hormones I become less “loving” and sweet with my partner and if I “need” my dose I become kinder and more careful with my partner??
-You are right.
-Seriously?
-Yes.

hombre dormido después sexo

What’s more, this set of hormones whose’ names all end in … -ina (no, they have nothing to do with female names) affect mood, sleep, affectivity, irritability … and, of course, the sexual appetite. That is, they act on certain characteristics of our personality.

-With the age…
– Uh, uh, uh don’t go on that road, please…
– Yes, with the age, the woman’s libido is increasing.
– But that’s not the other way around?
– No, is not!

“Beyond what is believed, female sexual desire is as strong and voracious as that of men, except that society allows men to express it more openly, as Daniel Bergner, a columnist for The New York Times and author of the book “What do women want” says. 

Far from what is thought, it is from the age of 30 when the woman gets to increase her libido to its highest point. What happens is that the woman’s libido develops more slowly. But the sexual desire of women remains unchanged over the years, and even increases, the only thing they lose faster is the interest in their partners, something that we confuse with the lack of libido, “explains Kimberly Russell, researcher at Evolutionary biology, in the report “Evolution and behavior of the sexes.”

What is certain is that the libido is usually disappearing when menopause arrives, which is when the woman’s body considers that it is no longer ready for conception. Tranquility that you, men of #TheNowFamily, also happens to you;) There is masculine menopause.

– Andropause is commonly known as male menopause and consists of gradually decreasing the production of the hormone testosterone
– That’s the only one that does not end in -ina?
– Looks like that. The fact is that male menopause usually begins at age forty and in the process the ability to procreate is lost.
– How?! Just when women have their most sexual activity ?! It was supposed that nature was well made …
– Already…
“Well, what about men in andropause?”

Far from what is thought, it is from around the age of 30 when women gets to increase their libido to its highest point. What happens is that the woman’s libido develops more slowly. But the sexual desire of women remains unchanged over the years, and even increases, the only thing they lose faster is the interest in their partners, something that we confuse with the lack of libido, “explains Kimberly Russell, researcher at Evolutionary biology, in the report “Evolution and behavior of the sexes.” What is certain is that the libido is usually disappearing when menopause arrives, which is when the woman’s body considers that it is no longer ready for conception. But, let’s take it easy… Men do have a menopause as well! And it is called andropause!

menopausia andropausia

– Andropause is commonly known as male menopause and consists of gradually decreasing the production of the hormone testosterone.

– That’s the only one that does not end in -ina?

– Looks like is the only hormone not ending in -ina (dopamina, adrenaline and others are all -ina family). The fact is that male menopause usually begins at age forty and in the process the ability to procreate is lost.
– How?! Just when women have their most sexual activity ?! It was supposed that nature was well made …
– Yes, it is…
– “Well, what about men in andropause?”
– They have certain symptoms similar to women in menopause. These are constant fatigue, headaches, excessive sweating (hot flashes in women) and, of course, also lower libido.

Although we believe that boys-men-males are available (outgoing) always, it is not quite so.

According to a study, they reach their highest sexual levels in adolescence and sexual desire decreases as the years pass. 

“I bet you did not think it was like that, did you?”
– Well … But you still did not answered me, why the longer you stay without “doing” (practicing coitus, in Latin) the more you become excited?
– The excitation is proportional to the lack of these hormones. But beware!! The body is easily accustomed to both excess and defect, to see if so much “you already know” will end up damaged … You have to find a balance.

As for women who have recently been mothers, it should be clear that, just as man who falls asleep after achieving “the higher point” thanks to serotonin (somebody need it in capsules with prescription from the doctor in order to sleep 8 hours in a row), Another of those hormones ending in -ina begins to secrete into the woman’s body just after giving birth. And this is prolactin: the anti-desire hormone.

sexo despues parto

Yes, there is always a guilty for every situation and prolactin is the explanation for sexuality after pregnancy to make a dent in the relationships of couples. Prolactin is responsible for making the mother focus on keeping the baby and allowing her body to rebuild and return to normal after delivery.

– But then what happens when our moment of desire is not complemented by the desire of our partner? Are we disappointed? Do we “love” ourselves?
– Not so much, nor so little, to maintain an active but balanced sex life is healthy both physically and mentally, you have to know and above all, get to know well your partner.

There are moments for everything in life. The fundamental thing is to be aware of the moment in which we are and, beyond our needs, if we want to have quality sexual relations, we must always think about our partner.

Satisfying oneself is fine. But if we talk about a couple game, both sides have to win. Sex is the only game where the draw is a must!

– Have we clarified the doubts you had?
– Well, now you have to put the new knowledge into practice: D
– We would tell you to tell us but … we do not see it as necessary;)
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